Setting Goals: New year resolutions and beyond.

January is often a time when people make promises to themselves and others to change. And, as we all know, January is also the time when many of these promises fall by the wayside.

Keeping resolutions can be difficult.

For those of us working in the world of mediation and conflict resolution, we see people make resolutions all of the time (not just in January!). Throughout the year, individuals and groups make intentional decisions to live differently, to respond to others’ actions in a different way, and to be less judgmental of others.

Resolutions in this context are called agreements, and there is an accountability factor in them that is often missing from “New Year’s” variety. Mediators monitor agreements and encourage participants to meet their obligations. In certain instances, family members are also there to hold participants accountable. And in some cases, the persons involved in a conflict hold each other accountable too. Just like resolutions that fail, agreements can also fail if accountability at some level is not a reality.

Beyond accountability, resolutions need to be realistic if we hope to succeed.

In many businesses, nonprofit organizations, and social service agencies, the acronym SMART helps us define “good” goals:

• S = Specific
• M = Measurable
• A = Attainable
• R = Relevant
• T = Time limited

When making resolutions this year, try considering this framework. The calendar may have flipped over, but we still are the same person we were yesterday – perfect in one sense, but in another we could always use a little work!

Looking forward to seeing you and your growth in the new year.