I have a conflict. What are some options?

Conflict is a natural and inevitable part of human relationships. Although we often do not choose to have conflict, we can choose how we respond. How we respond can make a difference in what the outcome is. A constructive response often means constructive results.

Resources for Constructive Responses to Conflict

A Problem Solving Process

Step 1: Making the Approach

• Reflect on the Situation
• Invite the person to have a conversation
• Be clear about what the topic is
• State your intention for a positive resolution

Step 2: Sharing Perspectives

• Ask the person for his/her perspective.
• Paraphrase what you heard. Ask if there is anything else.
• Acknowledge your responsibility.
• Describe your perspective of the situation. Be specific.

Step 3: Building Understanding

• Name the issues that need to be resolved.
• Discuss one issue at a time, focusing on understanding.
• Check out assumptions.
• Explore interests (wants, needs, fears, and hopes) and feelings.

Step 4: Agreeing on Solutions

• Brainstorm possible options for each issue.
• Make agreements that meet both parties' interests.

Some Do's and Don'ts for Healthy Approaches to Conflict:

DO

• Set a positive tone when approaching other parties to discuss the conflict
• Find a time that is good for everyone
• Be respectful
• Be open to different ways of looking at the situation

DON'T

• Don't retaliate or give the other party "a taste of their own medicine"
• Don't use sarcasm
• Don't use labels or name-calling
• Don't discuss the situation when one or more of the parties is feeling really angry
• Don't decide on a solution before all parties have heard and understood each other
• Don't make assumptions about what the other people are thinking or feeling

To access more free resources, check out http://www.fscanada.org/. Facilitated Solutions is a sister organization that deals with workplace conflicts.

Contact Information at Mediation Services

Mediation Services helps individuals with many different types of conflicts including neighbours, families, acquaintances, community and faith-based groups, and workplaces. For general information, call the Front Desk at 925-3410. For a specific type of conflict, check out the chart below.

Intake Application

If your conflict is between neighbours or within your family (excluding divorce, custody or separation) you can download our Community Intake Application (Word format). Complete the application to us to begin the process. You can fax it to 925-3414 or mail to us 302 - 1200 Portage Ave, Winnipeg, MB R3G 0T5. You can e-mail it to info@mediationserviceswpg.ca.

• Up to home pagePage description: A Community Resource for Conflict Resolution

• 1. Mediation: What is it? Page description: FAQ's Comments on our definition of mediation, and the role of the mediator
• 2. Conciliation: What is it?Page description: What the concilliation process might look like